And Now, The Rest Of Sunday

Well, after the movie we decided to head off to that Haven of Homosexuality, that Cruise Spot of Hot Men, the Do-Him-Yourself Mecca, Lowe's; it's not quite the Homo Depot, but we don't have one of those in Smallville.

Carlos wanted to stop in to Lowe's to show me a tool he thought would make like easier for raking the leaves in the yard. See, Casa Carlos y Bob, has a big yard, with a lot of trees. I believe there are over fifty trees in the front yard alone, and that is not an exaggeration. So, it takes us a lot of time and leaf bags to clean up in the fall, and Carlos believed he had found the solution.

A, ahem, Yard Vacuum. Yes, indeedy, a little R2D2-looking mother-effer that sucked the leaves from the ground; it even had a removable blower attachment, which lead me to comment that this particular jiggy-mah-giggy [a Carlosism for gadget] both sucks. And blows. Thank you! I'll be here all week.

But seriously, folks, Carlos wanted the R2D2 thing, even after I pointed out that it had a sixteen gallon capacity. That might sound like a lot, but just last week we filled up ten 35-gallon leaf bags with leaves we'd removed from the driveway alone! I would have been sucking and emptying R2 twenty times just to clear the driveway!

Carlos. You gotta love him. And he's gotta love his jiggy-mah-giggys.

Needless to say, we didn't buy the Leaf Sucker, and Carlos had that Little-Boy-Who-Didn't-Get-A-Bike-For-Christmas look all day. Even when he cooked dinner, his lower lip stuck out like a shelf above his chin, which leads me to another thing about Carlos: his cooking style.

He is a kitchen sink cook. If we have it, throw it in.

He made a Chicken and Couscous dish last night, with fried onions, and a Farmer's Market salad of tomato and cucumber. The chicken was good, and I asked if he used Tabasco. Yes, he had. Tabasco. Garlic. Cumin. Salt.Pepper. Oil. Curry powder. Chipotle Pepper powder. And....And......And.......And something green, I think. Of course, there's paprika in it? I asked. Carlos puts paprika in everything; I think he dabs a little behind his ears before he goes to work. But no, paprika was the one spice in the cabinet he didn't throw at the chicken.

Still, and I'll give him this, it was good.

Later that night, I settled into watch the American Music Awards, even though a lot of those people on that show I have never heard of before. But there was some Kelly Clarkson, whom I love to hear sing, although Kelly has put on a wee bit of weight. Still, I love her voice.
And, yes, David Dust, I was even surprised at how much I liked Gaga, because, although there was still the histrionics and theatricality, you could actually her her sing, and she can sing. I may, emphasis on may, become a Gaganut.

Carrie Underwood say some song about a guy that done her wrong and it that sounded exactly like a song she sang a couple of years ago about, well, a guy who done her wrong so she trashed his truck. I've heard of the old saying, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it," but that doesn't mean keep re-releasing it either.

Now, I've already admitted that I changed my mind about the Gaga [sidenote: Carlos thought it was Madonna because any blond singer is Madonna] and that was hard enough. I have a hard time admitting I'm wro......wron.....Screw it. Then came Miss Whitney, and, well, she sounded good to me. She looked a little baby bumpish in that tight white dress, but she sounded good. Her voice didn't soar as high as it once did, but, last time, she sounded good.

Which leads us to Adam Lambert. Big show queen. I liked his performance a lot, because you rarely see men do that kind of over-the-top theatricality, unless they have back-up dancers do all the work. And, of course, since it was announced that his performance would have us all talking, there was the male dancer who rubbed his face in Adam's crotch, and the guy in the back that Adam kissed.

Of course, people are all agog that he did it, but, would they be if it was a female face-in-the-crotch, or a female kiss? Lambert called it a double-standard, and he's right. It's a show, get over it; and don't say that the kiddies were upset because they shouldn't have been up that late anyway.

Still, in the interests of fairness, Lambert said a lot of what he did was fueled by adrenaline and he hinted at improvisation. Bull. Those things are choreographed to within an inch of the dance moves, especially for TV; and listen closely if you can find the video and it's still up, because, just before he kisses the guy, he sings a line that says, and I'm paraphrasing, What I'm about to do will shock you.

It didn't shock me. Men kiss men all the time in my house.

Last but not least, this morning I saw this on the web:

Had I known there was such a thing as Strip Football, I might have had more fun in gym class.